Saturday, July 21, 2012

Speak...Listen...Learn...Or Laugh...

On any given day, I hear a variety of things. Some are funny. Some are just plain awful. Some are bizarre. Some just beg to be repeated. Some are only funny out of context. Some were actually serious and heartfelt but don't sound that way outside of the conversation that was had. Without further ado...

...Some of the things I have heard, said, or read in the last week...

-Are they riding a lawnmower?

-My kid has been selling our food on Craig's List.

-Set the pot heads free.

-You smell like whiskey and tobacco.

-Quit trying to show me your junk.

-This meat is 1000 times better than anything I have ever gotten at Shoney's.

-When is his wife going to let him have his nuts back?

-I just pulled this offer facebook page. (Read this on the Internet)

-Ask your questions. I will answer them. No honestly though.

-Just go put on a diaper.